This morning during suhur, I received some heartbreaking news. It felt so heavy that I couldn’t shake it off. And so I took that heartbreak and that heaviness to my prayer mat. After praying, I sat there and broke down in tears. All I could think of was the Name of Allah, Al-Jabbār, The Compeller, The Mender.

I cried to Him, Ya Jabbār, I come to You seeking refuge. Mend the parts of my broken heart and bring comfort to it. Ya Rabb, Ya Jabbār, console my heart, for You are the One who mends everything that is broken. The One who restores what feels shattered beyond repair.

Ya Rabb, I know You have not forsaken me, and I know better days are ahead, even if I cannot see them yet. Ya Allah, Ya Salām, pour Your peace and tranquility into my heart. You are the One who finds the lost and guides them, the One who finds the needy and provides for them.

Ya Rabb, just as You promised the Messenger ﷺ that You would give him so much that he would be well satisfied, grant me from Your bounty in a way that brings contentment to my heart. Ya Jabbār, Ya Fattāh, open for me Your doors of sustenance, mercy, and contentment. You are Ar-Razzāq, provide for me in ways I never expected, and in ways that draw me closer to You.

Ya Jabbār, Ya Waliyy, mend the broken parts of my heart and do not leave me to myself, or at the mercy of others, even for the blink of an eye. I ask for Your companionship in this life and in the next. Place in my life companions who are reflections of Your mercy. And even if they all turn away, I ask that You remain by my side as my Gentle Friend.

Ya Jabbār, fill every gap of my brokenness with Your mercy and with Your beauty. Heal my wounds and let this pain be a means of earning Your pleasure and closeness. Ya Rabb, as the warmth of my tears touches my face, let them be an expiation for my sins and an elevation in rank in Your presence, O Most Merciful of those who show mercy.

I have no one to turn to but You in my moment of defeat. And perhaps that itself is a mercy, that You remind me where my true refuge lies. I come to You seeking Your help. Ya Rabb, forgive me, have mercy upon me, guide me, console me, grant me well-being, and provide for me.

With Love,

Ibtisam